Sunday, February 21, 2010

Being Unfair

Why should I continue with this... is it fair to me not have what I want? Is it fair for me to be able to hold what I want and knowing that I cannot seek this here but yet you want me to stay is it fair for me to know that I will NEVER become what I want to be if I stay here? You have not even have offered the opportunity to prove it wrong. My guess when it breaks then you'll be ready to prove it wrong but then it'll be too late. I feel if you are reading this and in attempts to understand me then I feel that it's too late.

I am back at the beginning. I am back at where I started with nothing to give.

You may think I am being selfish then I guess I am being selfish. Selfish - concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself; seeking or concentrating on one's own advantage, pleasure, or well-being without regard for others For most people you would take that a being negative for those people I say you will never be able to win this argument as your negativity will not allow it.

Saturday, February 20, 2010


J. C. is a big fan of prowrestling and has been watching WWF/WCW/WWE/TNA since '87 in which favorite all-time wrestler is Hulk Hogan.

J. C. is loves the teams Indianapolis Colts, Chicago Cubs, and White Sox.

J. C. has never had a girlfriend prior to the 12th grade in high school had 2 girlfriends and neither relationship lasted any longer than 60 days.

J. C. enjoys reading Wikipedia because of all the important data that it has and can easily take pleasure in mapping from fact to fact.

J. C. has never owned a non-American made car.

J. C. loves the color orange, and black.

J. C. grew up in Anderson for 23 years and moved to Indianapolis to work in his career in Information Technology.

J. C. has been a Sprint user since May 2001 although they have pissed me off outrageously over time I have stayed with them.

J. C. longest relationship of any type has been with Staples where he has worked full-time and now part-time for 6.75 years starting back in February '99.

J. C. cannot cook food that requires a lot of use of stoves, ovens or any other kitchen equipment except a microwave.

J. C. watches the Simpsons and Family Guy like it's going out of style and favorite episode is "And the wiener is…" which first aired August 8, 2001.

J. C. was in the bottom 20% class ranking but in college he was #1 in his field and #2 overall.

J. C. has an IQ of 128.

J. C. has worked with two branches of the Federal Government in 2005, the IRS and DFAS, both contracts.

J. C. once spent a Saturday watching his favorite movie, Back to the Future I, II, and III. Star Wars I, II, III, IV, V, VI runs a close second.

J. C. is known to write poetry.

J. C. is a southpaw.

J. C. has two nieces, nephew and has 2 godsons and goddaughters.

J. C. favorite quotes are "I chose not to grow up instead I chose to grow on," and " If you want the rainbow, you have to put up with the rain."

J. C. was born on August 9, 1979.

J. C. enjoys eating pizza, hamburgers, and salads; yet his favorite restaurants are Blimpies and Subway.

J. C. isn't a quitter and never has back down from anything within reason.

J. C. wasn't breathing when he was born.

J. C. wears size 12 shoes and rings.

J. C. first chat room experience was in AOL (room name unknown), and non-AOL experience was, since then he has used icq, paltalk, and yahoo.

J. C. often skips the first step when walking up stairs of any kind.

J. C. realizes that there are days when his brain works slower than other days.

J. C. still loves the original Nintendo because of the Tecmo Football Game.

J. C. is on Skype - jcrussell79

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Cumulative Time

Two days ago I made the decision to give up soft drinks and hard candy for Lent. I also decided to get some exercise in my life for at least the next 40 days and hopefully it sticks with me after the 40 days. Additionally I have also I will resume life on Facebook starting February 26

Today I woke up with something weighing me down. Decisions that need to be made in my life has messed with with me mentally. Should I stay or should I go. Should I let well enough alone. Should I fix what I know I broken? Should I tell them that it isn't going to work the way I thought it would? I feel myself crying inside. I give up. I am done trying to make myself happy. It cannot be done.

Monday, February 15, 2010

No important news

I have just enable your ability to post directly to my blog without authorization. I am hoping I am not setting myself up for trouble and more anger but, here goes nothing.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Good Blog

Thank you lord for allowing me to enjoy today. This is by far the best day that I have been this happy in some time it is great thing when you open your heart to him and allow in how much clearer the days become. I know I don't say this alot because I am usually depressed and sad but today is different. Why I don't know it's just different. Maybe it's my job, maybe it's my twitter, maybe it's just my life I don't know. I know this won't feeling won't last forever but I do know while it's here I want to grasp them moment.

No Black History Month

First of all I want you to take a look at this attached link and read it fully Black History Month I'll give you a few minutes to absorb it's message.

Okay you have read it? Now let me first state what I agree with them in this blog.
1. There aren't any legal slaves in the United States today
2. There aren't any legal slave owners in the United States today.
3. Most people can tell you when Black History Month is.

Alright since the writer of this blog is only sixteen I would like to hope that they learn the world a little better than the just posting a blog that rips a month that teaches you about a different culture.

They stated in a festering statement there isn't any other Heritage Month but, there are and here are a few:

Asian Pacific American Monday is May
American Indian Heritage Month is November
American Hispanic Heritage Month is September 15 - October 15

There are plenty of other since you are making blogs on the Internet you may want to use that same Internet to do research on what your stating.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

If you were stuck on a deserted island what would you miss the most: easy access to food and shelter or the internet?

You can always get food and shelter from the island as it's a part of natural human survival skills but I think I would go crazy with having the Internet and most importantly twitter.

Weak Difference

I can't believe it has been entire week since I last wrote within my blog. I have had a lot of ups and lot downs. I have been happy some and I have been sad mostly. I can say that I haven't really been that depressed since last Thursday when it finally passed after my three day stint.
I hope that none of you that read this never have to go through with what I deal with. I know that isn't possible because I know that everyone has problems. I know that everyone has their demons that keep them down. I guess I should probably say I hope that it doesn't ever get you depressed as me.
I feel I need to take a break from my self loathing depressing expressions and feelings to say to him, "Thank you for all that you give me, I know the roads are always bumpy and you never give us more than we can handle. I just feel that I am getting more than my share at this point in my life. In the end though I remind myself, that if he has brought me to it then he will bring me through it. Finally I want say to him through this I want thank you for carrying me through the rough times of self doubt and sorrow."

Monday, February 8, 2010

Who is J. C.?

I am person who likes to have fun. Who enjoys to be happy but, recently I have been stricken with depression. I am an avid Colts fan. I am 30. I sincerely want a child. It pains me that everyday that I don't have one. I wish someone could allow me to know what it's like to be a father. I enjoy listening to Michael Jackson music (R. I. P.)
J. C. Russell likes to have fun.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

New Orleans Saints Super Champions

I want to say Congratulations to the New Orleans Saints for obtaining their first Super Bowl Title ever against the Indianapolis Colts. As painful as it is for me I have to say you guys deserve it.

Friday, February 5, 2010

Where were you born. And why.

I was born in Anderson, Indiana; I was born to make people happy :)

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Outside of twitter do you use any other social networks (i.e myspace, facebook, linkedin, plaxo)? Do you link them together?

Obviously I am very social. I have all of the above. Myspace and Twitter are linked together. Facebook and Plaxo are linked together and I only log into Linked when someone sends me a request to add them. If I were to class each I would say 1. Twitter 2. Facebook 3. Plaxo 4. Linkedin 5. Myspace

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

what is your favourite decade and offer a few reasons why it is your favourite?

I am not sure if I have a favorite decade. I have moments in each that were special. I am looking to make the 10s great just like the 00s, the 90s, 80s and the four months that I was in the 70s

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Republican or Democratic

I cannot say whether I am a Democrat or Republican. I try to stay in an inform voter. Vote on what I feel is the correct way not whether Bush, or Obama or Rush Limbaugh or Michael Moore says. Today I could be a Democrat and vote on things like they would but tomorrow I may be Republican and vote on things like they would. I refuse to stay one party over another.


Today I thought I was having a good day until it hit me that I am missing something in my life. I am missing something that makes me completely happy. Something that would make me complete. I can't understand why I cannot obtain it? Most others get it and don't want it or refuse to be responsible with it. It angers me. It sadden me.

I want to be alone, I want to be away from all of this since I cannot obtain my joy. I am desperately asking. I am begging you. I cannot do this to anyone else. I don't want anyone to feel what I feel.

I apologize to everyone. I am sorry to everyone. I am not whom you want me to be. I am not fulfilling my potential. I am sorry.

how old r u ?


Monday, February 1, 2010

Is that u in the picture?

Yes it is. I think I was a year old when that picture was taken